Wednesday, March 16, 2005

You Are Invited To A Housewarming Party!

Hey! Y'all need to come on over and check out my new digs I'm not completely unpacked, but I just can't wait to have you all over!! I love, love, love my new place. Casual attire is encouraged, any and all gifts will be warmly accepted, and by all means, please bring a guest! People will be dropping in and out and so just pop in when you can. Can't wait to see you and show off my new home. Oh, and blogspot, it's been real.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Hop to it!

Dear Easter Bunny,

As you may or may not be aware, Target has an abundance of Lindt milk chocolate bunnies and carrots. As always, you may keep the marshmallow Peeps where they the reject bin along with those disgusting, pathetic-excuse-for-candy orange circus peanuts, those peanut butter things wrapped in the black and orange paper that people try to pass off for Halloween treats, and the candy corn.


Saturday, March 12, 2005

If You Show Me Yours, I'll Show You Mine

I'm feeling really vulnerable. I'm throwing a spontaneous party here, and I'm afraid that either no one is gonna show or that when they get here, they will think it's totally lame and just duck out before I notice they stopped by. I promise that things aren't always this, yaawwwnnn, b-o-r-i-n-g around here--allow me to steer you towards some good stuff in the November archives. That's right, November. Seems making the transition from hot single mama to nearly married mama hasn't been very exciting for anyone but moi. In hopeful anticipation of having some new visitors pop in over the weekend, at the invite of Michele, just wanted to say hi! and ask that you please leave an email addy and a URL to your site so that I can be sure to bring some lovin your way.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Questioning my agnosticism

I ask you, how could there not be a God when this past weekend's trip to Chicago to accompany K to the Ashlee Simpson concert was postponed? We found out that Miss Simpson will be making a stop in St Louis next month and so the good concert coordinators were kind enough to refund our tickets for the Chicago show to allow us to make the 80 minute round trip to see her rather than the 9 hour plus one. Cool! Plus, this gives me more time to score one of those Nexium t-shirts. K was only a little bummed about waiting for a few more weeks- I promised her an extra t-shirt purchase at the concert.

Spring break my ass.....

Last Friday afternoon, I walked across a half empty campus, sun shining, nearly 70 degrees, past my fellow hard core (read, hope the professor takes note of our obvious commitment and assigns due extra credit) classmates who were all optimistically sportin flip flops, and smiled at all the feel good, we are so outta here spring break bound energy.

Cut to the weekend. Cloudy. Cold. Raining. Oh, well. As good an excuse as ever to catch up on some serious house cleaning. Finally put away the Christmas decorations...shut it, I *know* it is March. Ignoring the fact that it's supposed to snow later in the week, started packing up the sweaters and turtlenecks and pulled out my polka dot swimsuit and sandals. Got a hold of myself before I packed away the down comforters and flannel sheets. Dusted for the first time in, well, never mind. Sounds like a blast, right? Those kids down in Florida ain't got nothin on me.

With the weekend shot, and Monday morning fast approaching, I started making big plans for my week off. As the universe smiles upon me, the girl's spring break does not coincide with mine which meant that I would have an entire week to blog at my leisure, do a little shopping, catch up on a TON of reading I'm behind in (Ecology, Art History, and the influence of Darwinism on Victorian era literature--now why would I be behind with such stimulating material at my fingertips???) and write a paper that's looming---oh, and because I'm entirely unrealistic, I picked up two novels from the library that I have been eager to read. Go, lu, go!

Late Sunday afternoon, J started to get sick. You know how you can just tell by looking at your kiddo that something's not right. Perfect. No fever, it's just a cold, but she was miserable enough that I knew she wouldn't be going to school the next morning. I spent my Monday wiping a runny nose, administering OJ, and comforting an extremely whiney four year old. Between the two of us, I think we had four hours of good sleep the night before. Good times! By bedtime on Monday, she was 100% better and helping me pack her lunchbox for the next day.

I woke up on Monday knowing full well that I probably had 24 hours before I was going to feel like crap. Had the scratchy throat, runny nose, and stuffy head. Last night I was burning up and having the chills. J put her tiny hand on my forehead and said, "Sweetie, I think you have a fever. You might need to take some medicine. Want to share some of my grape stuff?" sweet is that? I have gone through two boxes of Puffs and woke up this morning looking and feeling as though I had the shit beat out of me. Puffy, swollen, purple eyes, red, sore nose, and achy, achy, achy. J presented me with a 'git wel' card this morning that featured several drawings of various animals. One of which I interpreted as a tortoise but was quickly corrected:

Mom, that is a hippo. Don't you see its brussel sprouts?

Brussel sprouts?

Yeah, you know these? ( impatiently pointing to her nostrils while rolling her eyes at her mother's obvious stupidity)

Me, smiling in spite of how bad it hurt my face to do so, Oh, nostrils.

Indignantly, That's what I said. Sprouts.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005


Reality smacked down fantasy--and it was wonderful. I confess to being *that* girl who takes the Gin Blossoms' lyrics to heart..."....if you don't expect too much from me, you might not be let down..." I cheat. I hate to be disappointed and so I don't really aim to high. It's not that I always expect the worst, I just never believe I'll really get the best. This past weekend was a pleasant surprise as I was served straight up perfection.

We arrived at the spa with time to spare before our massage appointment and so we donned our suits and slipped into the hot tub. We then wrapped ourselves up in our robes and headed for the meditation room, closed our eyes and drifted away. We were soon greeted by our masseuse team and enjoyed a very relaxing massage. We finished off our visit with some wonderful hot tea and then packed up and headed for our room.

Hmmm... two and a half hours before we needed to leave to make our dinner reservation. We could take a dip in the pool or.....well, what would you do if it were just the two of you, sans kidlets, following a sensual massage, in a hotel room that promised no interruptions? *Exactly*

Dinner was beyond fabulous. Wonderful atmosphere, great service, to die for food. It was a night of firsts for lu. I had the first of what promises to be my new favorite drink, a Midori Sour and for dessert, a creme brulee topped with berries. We took our time. We talked. We laughed. We planned. We remembered. I got a little tipsy, cuz, well, I'm a very cheap date and one drink is all it takes.

After a leisurely dinner we headed for the theatre to see Sideways. We enjoyed it but didn't realize beforehand that it was a black comedy. What? I didn't know Chris Rock or Martin Lawrence were in that. Uh, no stupid:

"Black comedy is otherwise known as black humour and possibly first appeared in the late 1950’s and early 1960’s in American literature. It is a dark comedy (hence black) and finds great humour in what most people regard as inappropriate subject matter. Black comedy mocks serious topics such as death and religion and makes fun out of various organised, logical aspects of our everyday existence. It is often grotesque and morbid"

The poster for Kingdom of Heaven was up and S commented that he was excited to see the film and was curious as to who was starring in it.

Me: Uh, honey, that's Orlando Bloom right there on the poster, larger than life.

Him: No way. I don't think it's anybody famous.

Me: It's Orlando Bloom

Him: Nope. Doesn't look anything like him. If not for anything else, you could rule him out as that is *definitely* not his nose.

Me: It is Orlando Bloom

Him: You need to stop smokin crack. I think you had one Midori Sour too much

Me: I only had one Midori Sour

Him: Exactly

Me: Whatever. That is Orlando Bloom

Him: OK, If you are right, I'll make sure you have 10 orgasms...

Me: Hmmm...we are talking about a 24 hour window, right?

Him: Yep, but doesn't matter because that is not Orlando Bloom

Me: Ooohhh, I can't wait to get on the internet and prove you wrong.

Needless to say, we are gonna have to cash in some of our I.O.U. babysitting certificates in order for me to collect my due. S doesn't seem to be too upset about his loss...probably cuz he knows he can knock it out in 3.5 sessions--I'm talented that way.

After the movie, we were tired, but content when we stumbled back into our room after midnight. As promised, our room had a wonderfully deep roman tub which I filled with lavender and surrounded with jasmine scented candles. We had a long, nice soak and then fell into our king sized bed. We actually got to spoon in the absence of J squooshed in between us.

It was perfection.

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Now we can all sleep better at night....

Just wanted all to know that I was wrong about my ex 'I'm-so-tortured-poet' boyfriend...turns out he did include an ode to moi in the form of a work that laments my inevitable descent into hell. Nice.

In other news, returning to college following a fifteen year hiatus has proved to be humbling in the least. Seems I'm not as smart as I remembered and all that cockiness and self-importance of my twenties was, well, just that. I'm having to study my ass off and because I was also sure that I was an excellent writer, I'm an English major who's shocked to find that it takes me a good three days effort to turn out an essay, research paper, etc., that's worthy of a generous B. That being said, just this past week I received feedback from two different professors who described my work as excellent and even outstanding. Really? That feels good but it certainly doesn't negate the fact that it took blood, sweat and tears to achieve their praise. This shit is hard!

On the plus side, the college experience this go around is certainly more fulfilling as I feel it is not merely a means to an end. I remember being seriously disillusioned with the establishment...having to earn a degree in order to get a job in order to make the money in order to buy the things.... I had an affinity for Thoreau (even though I couldn't get through Walden for the life of me) and dishearteningly thought I was just a part of the herd...that we were all brainwashed, missing the boat, wasting our lives, selling out.

I still fantasize about living a simple life....running away to the mountains, living off the land, armed with nothing but an endless supply of books and something to scribble my horrible prose on. The reality is that now that I'm a parent of two, it's no longer all about me and if I'm honest with myself, I'm not the nature goddess I like to imagine. Some friends have a lovely home out in the country that boasts FLYING roaches the size of your middle finger. I kid you not. I just can't see myself hangin up close and personal with things of the buzzing, creeping-crawling persuasion. Just as a sidenote, I am certain that I alone figured out that you can kill wasps, large spiders, and yes, even the occasional roach armed with nothing more than a can of Lysol. You rid your home of unwanted pests and at the same time eliminate 99.9% of germs in the said pest's vicinity.

Hey, is it me or do you look a little green? Thanks for all the birthday wishes and the ooohhs and aaahhhs over my was a really good one. Oh, you do look so cute when you are filled with envy. Well, not to rub it in or anything but, guess what? Go ahead and ask me. My "fiance" and I are skipping town on Saturday morning to embark on a romantic spa weekend. We've got a fabulous room booked at a lodge complete with a Roman tub, a scheduled couple's massage, time to hang out in the jacuzzi and linger poolside, reservations for a romantic candlelight dinner, and a check out time of 11 the next morning. Sunday promises a late lunch followed by a little shopping and a four hour drive back home to our girls who we will undoubtedly be missing terribly at that point. I think the kidlets are more excited about our going away than we are as they have their own fun weekend ahead of them. Aunt L is coming over for a sleepover and the promise of a trip to the movies, dinner at their favorite Chinese place and pizza on Sunday--J keeps asking how much longer til we leave. It's times like these that I feel so loved.

What else? Oh, so I'm still on the fence about my new therapist. We have only had two sessions thus far but he made me cry the last go around and so if nothing else, he's been quick to figure out what buttons to push. There's that damn humility rearing it's ugly head again! Just when I was certain that all I needed to accomplish was to tie up some loose ends, I discover there are a lot more hibernating spots that have unraveled and can't be ignored at the risk of the whole f-ing thing falling apart. S and I have only met with our couple's counselor once as we aren't afforded a whole lot of flexibility with S's work schedule. We are working out the kinks and so hopefully we can commit to at least two sessions a month.

Hey, this will make you feel better. The first weekend in March will find me rubbing elbows with hundreds (?) of screaming, preteen fans of AshleeSimpson. Yep, K and I will be crusin down to Chicago in just days. Shoot, that doesn't give me much time to track down the Nexium t-shirt I am so gonna wear. Maybe I will get lucky and Ashlee will be stricken with an extreme case of acid reflux and we will get to just hang out at the hotel and nap by the pool. I'll say it again...I am the coolest mom ever and I really, really love my daughter.

To gain more points as coolest mom ever...Green Day is coming to St Louis in May and we got tickets! How my child gracefully hopped, skipped and jumped from Ashlee Simpson to Green Day within a matter of weeks, I don't know. She seems to think that by caking on black eyeliner it somehow brings her closer to her version of God...Billie Joe. It goes without saying that I had to explain to her that the energy at the Ashlee Simpson concert and that of the Green Day concert would be quite a bit different. At least I won't feel as ancient at this concert. Now that K has discovered that the lead singer of Green Day has a house in Berkeley, she's ready to move back to California. Not to put the cart too far ahead of the horse, but it could happen....another six years or so.

Of course, my four year old J wants to go to the Green Day concert too. She recognizes Billie Joe, Mike, and Tre and rocks out to their songs on the radio. Just the other day, she was hard at work on a crayon drawing of the band. Here's a tidbit of dinner conversation:

J: I'm gonna go to a Green Day Concert too

K: J, you can't go. You are too little. You would be the youngest person there.

J: K, don't break my heart.

K and I having a good laugh.

J: I'm serious. My stomach already hurts.

That's my J. Very literal that girl is.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Happy Birthday To Me!

Here's the thing. My birthday is the day after Valentines Day and so I usually get gypped. The men in my life have always taken advantage of their good fortune and given me two-two-gifts-in-one---you know, one card, one gift, that says I love you and oh, by the way, happy birthday too.

Well, not this year!! My sweetie did it up right. It all started on Friday night when he arranged for a sitter, we got all spiffy, went out to dinner and grown-up drinks and finished the evening off by snuggling up in the theater and watching Million Dollar Baby. At the restaurant, he surprised me with a card that explained I was to receive one gift for the next four five day Valentine and birthday celebration. Now, that's what I'm talkin about. He then presented me with my first gift:

Saturday morning I woke up, rubbed the sleepies out of my eyes, pulled on the hubbies baggy t-shirt, and stumbled to answer the front door. Who the hell rings your doorbell at 9AM on a Saturday morning? Glad you asked:

Cleanliness is next to godliness:

Day three of the valibirthday celebration was still in full swing. Guys, wanna know the real way to a woman's heart? Pay someone else to clean her toilets, mop her floors, and exterminate the dust bunnies. I checked my email on Sunday to find an ecard waiting for me with the news that I am now the ecstatic recipient of a bimonthly visit from a cleaning service. Woo-freakin-hoo!

Only a little spoiled:

So, how does one top a box of Godiva truffles, a dozen gorgeous, long stemmed, red roses, the gift of having someone else clean your toilets, and a heartfelt, seriously guaranteed to get your groove on cd compilation?

S wrapped up my valibirthday celebration by arranging someone to cover him at the hospital so that he could drive the 90 miles over to my part of town to share my special day with me. He apologetically offered up this to me:

Him: I'm not promising anything as far as my cake baking ability goes

Me: Oh, I'm sure it's yummy. You used a mix, no? *He knows my all time favorite cake is Super Moist Yellow Cake Mix topped with store bought Milk Chocoalte Frosting*

Him: Yeah, but I'm sure there is even a way to mess that up

Me: Cutting into the cake only to be met with some serious resistance as the knife hit the center What the hell?

Him: laughing You might have to get a little messy to get in there and find out what's going on

Me: Heart beating a little faster...You baked something into the cake?

Look what was excavated: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't stop smiling.